Yesterday, I enjoyed a wonderful 12 mile run with Bo and some terrific running friends.
After enjoying our normal pre-run fuel, we were out the door heading towards the Hudson by 7:05.
Our plan was to run 12 miles along the Hudson River, hopefully running into Ellen and Dori along the way.
Unlike most of my runs lately, the Hudson River breeze and lower temperatures made the run far more enjoyable. Having Bo by my side was a welcome treat that I’ll miss once his pace is back to where it was pre-injury. One of our favorite things to do while running is people watch. We immediately hit each other when we want the other to see an adorable dog, an awkward person, or some other interesting diversion.
Around mile 6 we saw three friendly faces running towards us: Jes, Dori, and Ellen! It was wonderful to catch up with them and watch the miles clock by as we heard about Dori’s new job, Ellen’s world as a teacher who works with 100% Spanish students, and life in general. It never ceases to amaze me how much easier running is with a group. Jes had wonderful pace goals in mind and therefore sped off after a mile with Bo, during which they kept close to an 8:30 pace! It was amazing to watch their speed and form as they sprinted ahead of us.
As we came upon the 10 mile mark, we parted ways as they were heading back towards Columbus Circle.
Bo and I continued up the Hudson River path for the next 2 miles, doing our best to maintain our pace. The views reminded me why I love doing training runs on the West Side. It’s easy to just zone out and run along the flat path which includes views of Lady Liberty, Freedom Center, New Jersey, USS Intrepid, and George Washington Bridge as you continue north.
We hit the 12 mile mark around 92nd Street and were proud of keep an average pace 10:10 pace during the run even though we both spent at least half the time talking with either each other or Dori and Ellen. This is something that’s always been tough for me but the longer I run the easier it gets.
We now have successfully followed month one of our Marathon Training Plan!
Unfortunately, my long run euphoria only lasted a few hours at which point I saw the following tweets:
I have a workout confession.
By the time I woke up this morning, I was on the verge of depression when I thought about yesterday’s run. There are a number of us training for the New York City Marathon and every weekend it’s great to talk about long runs, normally motivating each other to get out there early and enjoy the road.
However, this morning all I could do was focus on the fact that most people had done 14 or 15 miles this weekend versus the 12 on my plan.
Why didn’t I push myself harder? I should have done 14 when I heard Dori was doing that distance. Why isn’t my pace as fast as their pace. What if no one is there to run with me during the Healthy Living Summit long run? Why did I organize it when I’m the slowest runner?
I started talking about these thoughts and emotions with Bo this morning. Luckily, he helped me gain some clarity. While these emotions are normal, they can negatively affect my training more than any injury ever could. Five years ago, I couldn’t imagine running a mile. I wasn’t born a runner nor was I an athlete growing up. I’ve already accomplished so much more than I ever thought possible.
In addition, he reminded me of where I was a year ago.
- My Staten Island Half Marathon recap was titled “Someone Else’s Legs” because I felt so fast- keeping a 10:26 pace in the half marathon.
- My horrible Marathon Tune Up run was finished at a 12:21 pace.
- Many of my training runs last year were closer to an 11 minute pace.
- I ran the my first marathon at 11:42 split.
This is my second time training for a marathon so I won’t have the same PDR feelings that I had last year. Instead, I need to remember how far I’ve come and how much I benefitted from a few months of speed training this winter.
There will always be people out there who are faster and can run farther. But, this fact shouldn’t take anything away from the great run I had yesterday. After all, it was exactly the distance and time that my coach had prescribed. I can’t change the past and the choices I made; I can only change the future. In order to enjoy runs, something that is supposed to be stress relieving, cathartic, and enjoyable, I need to remember to run my own run each day, make reasonable goals and compete only against myself. After all, health and wellness go much further than just the physical. To truly live a balanced life, one must be fit and content both physically and mentally.
I love this post. Thank you for sharing. <3
It’s so easy to get caught up comparing yourself to others in all aspects of life, let alone marathon training. Luckily, if you can snap out and put things into perspective, you realize the only person you should compare yourself to is yourself! Looks like Bo helped you remember this 🙂 Great job! (and if it makes you feel better, I’m training for NYC and only ran 11 miles on my long run this week :))
I struggle with the same “why” thoughts. Although I swam as a kid and teen I never was super competitive, stopped at age 18, and was heavier then than I am now. I have become an athlete in my late 20’s and 30’s. I run at times with a pretty well known running club. The speed workouts can be very intimidating but I learned last week that they didnt know my pace they just knew i was out there working as hard as them. THEY WERE TELLING ME “GOOD JOB?!!?”
Its all about YOU!!!!! I wish you lived near Philadelphia, we’d be good running buddies
If it makes you feel better, I was not supposed to do 14 yesterday. I changed my plan around twice — first increasing mileage quicker than my plan said because of last week’s half, and second changing my step-back week from this week to next because I am very busy next weekend. So don’t feel like you *should* have done 14. You are right on track. And you have gotten so much faster, many of your recent runs have been much faster than mine! It is hard not to compare yourself to others, but try not to — you are doing this for you and you have improved so much since last year!
The distance will come when it is supposed to per your plan. You are doing great.
Love the pic of us!
Great post. I think this is something we ALL struggle with and admitting it and blogging about it very brave/awesome of you. Like the other commentors said, there will always be someone who runs faster or more miles, but it shouldn’t diminish *your* accomplishment. You’ve come a long way re: running in the last few years and you should be damn proud of that. Think about all the people who were still sleeping by the time you finished that 12-miler!
completely feel you on this post. as a newbie runner, i feel a lotttt of pressure reading how well others are doing and how far ahead they are in their training.
Makes me feel like EEK, am I doing this right?
today for instance i was only supposed to run 10 miles, but everyone in my pace group was running 14. Felt like the odd one out and that I wasn’t as strong as them.. which in hindsight is kinda dumb because if I did run the full 14 with them, I might have gotten hurt.
We really are all in it together (Que high school musical dance moves!) and i think you and Bo are doing INCREDIBLE.
keep up the awesome work and keep doing what you’re doin. 🙂
@Shannon: You’re doing an awesome job especially since you just decided to jump into marathon training. It’s all about your plan and your dreams for the marathon. Talking to Bo today I realized that. It’s also little things like remembering that oh, next weekend Theodora is doing 13 b/c she has a race whereas I’ll do 14. 🙂
You should be so proud of the 12 miles. Doing your own training plan and running at your own pace is key to enjoying the training and race.
I have major workout jealousy…especially when injured…but am proud of what I can do.
Keep it up!
@Cynthia: Thanks for the kind comment. I think we all have workout jealousy every now and then but we just have to step back and realize how far we’ve come and accomplished!
I am sooo glad you posted this! I feel the same way when I hear of the amazing things people do. I can’t help but naturally feel jealous about it and it can really get me down. Thanks for putting it out there and making me feel like I am not the only one! Keep up the good work, Ashley! You have come so far and have a lot to be proud of!
@Katie: Thanks for your comment! It is tough to realize that everyone has different abilities, time capacity, and things going on in their life. I could never train for something like a sprint tri, half ironman, or anything right now since I can barely fit in marathon training. But, I have to be proud of that alone!
I loooved this post! My “long run” for HLS is 4 miles, and I’m so slow that I’m too embarassed to ask anyone else!
@Emily: Don’t be embarrassed!! Do you want to be on the email list so at least you know what time we’re all leaving. Maybe I should tweet that it’s not just a long run as well. I’m sure there are other people who’d like to run 3-4 miles!
I’d love it if you’d put me on the e-mail list, thanks!
I love this post.
You should be proud of your capabilities, and how far YOU go and what YOU can do.
I know that I’m guilty of the same things, comparing myself to others.
Im not going to lie though… i’d love to know what it’s like to run an 8 mile just once. JUST once… haha
@Mary: Wouldn’t we all love to know what that feels like? All I can say is that maybe you can feel it during a speed workout on the treadmill for a few seconds. 🙂 HA! We’re all guilty of comparing and coveting what others have but sometimes it helps to just step back and covet what WE have!
I am so glad you posted this! I struggle with this all the time, especially being new to this community. Everyone has such great accomplishments, and I’m afraid to admit my knee is giving me trouble after just running 3-4 miles a few days a week. We all have to start somewhere and remember that everything we push our body’s to do is a great accomplishment. Never be ashamed of your run!
@Ashley: Don’t say “just” running 3-4 miles a few days a week. That is so much more than you could be doing! Thank you for the kind comments and welcome to an amazing community. You’ll see that everyone goes through injuries, rest periods, and times of amazing athletic growth. Good luck!
I definitely feel this way sometimes, but then I realize less miles equals more time on my couch, and then I’m okay with it.
This is the first time I’ve read your blog, and this post really resonated with me (so much, in fact, I will plan to become a regular reader). I am definitely guilty of comparing my pace, my mileage, my everything to everyone else and it gets awfully depressing after awhile. Thanks for helping me put everything in perspective. And wow – look at how far you’ve come pace wise! You give me hope for myself!
Great post Ash!!! And hello – sorry it’s been so long! Just so you know I really have been admiring how hard you’ve been working and how you’ve been progressing! 12 is wonderful and you’re certainly on a better track with marathon training then I am at the moment. The tough and wonderful part about running is that there is always something to strive for. But don’t forget to enjoy all that you’ve already done!!
@Melissa: Hi lovely lady! Congratulations on the engagement! It seems like your running is going well too! Hope to catch up soon!
I struggle with this too! I ran 7 miles yesterday at a slow pace, even for me – 14 min miles. In perspective though, I felt really good and I was wearing a heart rate monitor and my heart rate was right where I wanted it to be. I just have to remember how far I’ve come since I’ve started running – I’m on average much faster than I was six months ago and a year ago I couldn’t even run a 5k without stopping. I try not to worry about folks like you who are rocking paces in the 10-minute range on long runs. 🙂 Great run!
@Britney: You’re doing a great job just by getting out there. It takes baby steps. I started running by adding a minute each day on the treadmill. Baby steps! Soon that 14 minute mile will be 13 min and so on!
Awesome post! I dealt with pace jealousy a lot last year when I was training for my marathon as the long distances really slowed me down.
Now this year I’m *only* training for a half while everyone else seems to be training for a full and I’m having total distance jealousies! Anyways, I think its really important to ONLY compare yourself to yourself and I try really hard to quell comparison thoughts when I get them!
@Amber: Never use the word only to describe training. Regardless of what we’re training for it’s an achievement just to get out there! 🙂
A HUGE reason I love running and racing is that the only person you are EVER competing against, is yourself (well, unless you’re elite – ha).
As for the mileage – I was supposed to knock out 14 last week and could only muscle up 11. I beat myself up about it (even though I was on vacation!!) and then realized that it’s not going to keep me from completing my marathon. It’s not about the miles — it’s about the effort, the drive, and the quality of the runs. You clearly had a great run. Great job!!
@Michelle Yes, Michelle, you’re right I need to remember that I’m only competing against myself! Great thoughts about mileage versus drive and effort! I’m so excited for this week’s 14 miler in Chicago!
Loved this post! I know it’s something I struggle with as well – but we all need to remember there’s nothing wrong with 12 miles! Stick to your plan. It’s made for you, and will let you get to your finish line strong and injury free.
ahhhhhh we really need to run together! 🙂
honestly, i completely agree with you and i’m glad you wrote about this because it’s tough seeing so many other runner bloggers run much faster even on their “bad” days. 12 mi at 10:10 is something to be extremely proud of! a 10 min/mi is NOT slow. and you’re right – you’ve improved so much just from last year! AND it sounded like you really enjoyed the run and had fun. that’s what it’s all about!
really good post!
xo christine
love the honesty. i think we all feel this way sometimes – i know i do! it’s way too easy to compare myself to others sometimes. it’s always nice to come back to the realization that, “i’m training for a marathon, and i’m a total badass. period.” haha, but really though. everyone’s training and mileage and experience differs, but we’re all running toward the same end.
keep it in perspective and remember how badass you are. nice job!
I read this post over the weekend on my phone so I couldn’t comment but I had it on my to do list ot come back and comment!I love your honesty and can totally relate to how you are feeling! Being a slower runner myself I never want to participate in group runs because i am scared I won’t be able to keep up. In fact I was nervous about tweeting you about the HLS long run because I dind’t want to be the slowest one on the run. Thanks for the encouragement!
Love this post Ash! It’s so great to see how many people relate to it too. I definitely do – especially working with fitness nuts it can be hard to feel like I’m not “keeping up”. But totally agree with how great it is to look at past times/last year and see that you are making improvements. And don’t worry – I will run with you at HLS!! 🙂
Caitlin: I can’t wait to run with you in Philadelphia! It’s gorgeous and hopefully the weather will be on our side!
You hit the nail on the head for me. I always feel like “the slow one” and am ashamed to admit my running times. However, I often have to step back and have my boyfriend get me in check much like Bo did for you. When I look where I started and where I am now, it is amazing and worth a pat on the back. We all have our own journeys, our own stories, and each body is different. Some were born runners and others weren’t (that’d be me) but each of us have our own little victories to be proud of and grateful for!
And seriously, 10:10 pace for a 12 miler! That’s awesome!
Just found your blog from These Happy Miles. This should make you feel better- I run slow- about 11 mins/mile. I running my first half marathon this Sunday and I’m so scared. But, I am trying to trust that I completed my 12 week training schedule and somehow I will cross that finish line and be able to say I ran a half marathon.
If it makes you feel better, I always covet your times and distances. I am training for my second half marathon. One year ago I could barely run a mile. I’m still slow and wonder if I will ever get faster, but I try to stay positive. I love your blog because you are so honest in your struggles. I think you are doing awesome and 12 miles, holy crap! I would love to finish 12 miles at your pace. Keep up the good work!